riding the wave called survival

I'm not on any anti ds. I think I feel better just taking them a couple of weeks. I'm sure anyone else may think that is strange. I like feeling as much as possible. I like feeling teary eyed when I'm grateful. I like feeling guilt when I need to correct something. I just had to use them when events were reaching a breaking point. I felt immediate relief. The Lexapro work very quickly for me. To be honest, I may take them now if I didn't gain a large appetite on them. I'm going to get thin and gorgeous someday in this coming year.

Ive been having a manic up week. Also had the downs. Up when I'm working and paid, down when an unexpected bill pops up. Feel like I'm treading water. Its trickle up poverty. I heard that phrase used and it fits the economic times we are in. This is how the government is helping, by taking any of the wealth left to do important business like sale new cars. I know that is old news. But it still bothers me. If I had money for a new car, I won't need help from the government. I'd go in and haggle with the dealer and certainly get the same deal the government would get me. I could go on but I don't want to have negative thoughts. Takes too much energy.

The Internet service was turned off for a few days. Helped me not knowing what is going on in the news. Better to have a rest with all of that. Also allowed me to write more of my fictional stories. I sat here with my laptop without anything to read on it so just started writing my stories. It was fun. Love expression through the written word.

I'm so tired now. Have to sleep now. Goodnight