This is a poor me post

I'm so frustrated. I am broke and spend all my time switching money around. It was questionable if I could even get money for gas. I put in five dollars of gas this week. Its getting difficult. I'm looking for employment. I have been consuled by my Bishop not to sell my home (forced savings). I guess I can't be trusted to hang on to my cash. Its not because I'm a shopaholic but because I'm too generous when others ask for help. That is what has but me in this mess. My Bishop also mentioned how hard it is for singles since we don't have a spouse for a sanity check. Sometime he and his wife call to just check to see if they have things right. Sanity check....that makes sense. I could use a balance system like that.

My yard is big. Monsoons are here blowing wind each night, so I spend a couple of hours cleaning up the pine needles, the palm junk, and the oranges and grapefruit left over from last season that falls to the ground. I have 23 citrus trees. The pool is hard to clean since all this falls in it. Its so hot outside (115 degrees) so the pool needs lots of chemicals and care.
I bought some mini tootie roll pops and found a dollar for a bag laying around. I bet that I will not find any more change soon.
My son is living with me but he only helps when asked. I just want someone to notice and do it. Doesn't any one raise kids to make the world a better place around them. Oh I raised him. opps. He was frustrated doing yard work the other day. He wants the gardener back. Too bad. Its good to push around the lawn mower in 115 degree heat.

Also read somewhere that you can not reverse age. The article said you can slow it. I feel like I've reversed it. Maybe its because I had a serious illness for years. Also stopped drinking, smoking 23 years ago. I feel as good as I did when I was much younger. I was somewhat discouraged. I played tennis with a friend that hadn't played tennis for many years. She beat me even though I've been practicing each day. At least I felt like I was a good match for her. She was on her high school tennis team so many I didn't do so bad.

I do have faith I'll get a good job. That a miracle will happen. I'm so thankful for a good Bishop and counsulers that look after my welfare.